However, the weather here, as ever, remains unpredictable, so if anything happens in that regard, I'll just do what I did last week and shift things over a day. In other words: shift happens. 😏
Now, onto our main feature...
When is a debut feature not a debut feature? When it's a student film in disguise. Multi-hyphenate Rick Sloane was still a film student at Los Angeles City College when he made Blood Theatre (aka Movie House Massacre) and boy, does it show. He was just a teenager when he wrote the script, and, having already made several shorts, many of which are referenced in the film itself, he decided it was time for something a bit more ambitious. (His referenced shorts include: Clown Whores of Hollywood, Chainsaw Chicks, Amputee Hookers and Nightmare Of The Lost Whores, all of which sound awesome- only the first one crops up in the movie itself via actual footage.)
Knowing he'd never get the permission to make a feature-length film, he simply turned in a ten-page treatment of the script and passed it off as another short, getting the okay to shoot it- and more crucially, borrow the equipment he needed to do it- as a direct result. Using unpaid local talent for the most part- save the one star he could afford, cult actress Mary Woronov- he then set about making his first feature on the sly while he was still in college.
Never really intending it for theatrical release, even Sloane knew the end result was an amateurish mess, which is why he initially credited it to his assistant director, Alice Raley, who happily took the credit when he opted not to, for the film's brief theatrical release. It was later rectified for home video release, after Sloane had a modest hit with the film Hobgoblins.
For the record, it didn't do her much good, but then I can't imagine Sloane thought it would, or probably even Raley herself- though he did continue to work with her for Hobgoblins, which she served as a production assistant on and helped him edit. Haley also appears as one of the "popcorn victims"- aka one of the people that has popcorn thrown in her face by the wily Selena (Joanna Morales, aka Joanna "Foxx").
Rather than be impressed at his moxie, Sloane's professors were brutal, telling him he should have shot it as a short, as there wasn't enough material to sustain a feature in the first place. Well, they weren't entirely wrong, but they weren't entirely right, either, as Sloane managed to land a deal for a theatrical release, anyway, albeit a brief one, since slasher films were still all the rage at the time, and few studio-types turned down the opportunity to make a quick buck from a low budget horror flick.
Critics weren't much kinder, but that's perhaps to be expected. Over the years, the film has acquired a bit of a cult following, thanks to Sloane's then-admittedly inept filmmaking skills, which feature oddball sound effects- including what sounds like a flare going off every time a door is opened- Sloane says he was actually going for a Star Trek sliding door "woosh"- and the cry of a wildcat when several people are attacked; and the trademark bad student film editing, where Sloane holds each scene a beat too long going out of an edit and then again, as he switches to a new scene, making for some hilariously delayed reactions.
The film's cast is also just terrible- save the lone professional of the bunch, Woronov, of course (who is deceptively made to look like the killer on the DVD cover above- she isn't) - and the lead actress bailed on the film 2/3rds of the way through, forcing Sloane to have to reshoot all of her scenes with a different actress (Jenny Cunningham), while another had a Valley Girl-style voice so grating (Morales), that Sloane opted to completely redub her performance with that of another actress!
I've actually had to deal with some of this sort of thing myself and it's no joke- my leading man opted out of my final short project in film school just before we were set to shoot it, and I ended up having to play the role myself, since we were only working with a skeleton crew and no one else could do it on such short notice. Said my professor after viewing the project: "And this is why directors should never act in their own films," lol. 😖
The dialogue is also pretty bad, though Sloane does manage to land the occasional funny bit, notably Woronov's snarky lines and most anything that comes out of Selena's mouth- or rather, doesn't, given that her performance was completely overdubbed.
Whoever delivered her actual lines, though- nice going, as the Foxx-y Morales is undeniably a highlight, as she breaks every rule in the employee handbook, including knocking the popcorn out of filmgoer's hands and into their face, berating the audience at one film in hilariously foul-mouthed fashion, and even flashing her boobs at them! 😲 My kind of girl, lol.
Sloane says they were going for a kind of slasher film as directed by John Waters, which is a great idea, even if the execution here leaves a lot to be desired. Waters did sort of do a couple of films that could be considered slasher-adjacent, including Multiple Maniacs and Serial Mom, both of which are pretty great, but even Waters on his worst day couldn't make anything quite as bad as this. The bad knife "acting" alone is the stuff of bad movie nirvana, as it seems as if everyone concerned has never brandished a knife in their lives.
As to be expected, hardly anyone here, whether the cast or anyone else involved, went on to do much of anything. I've covered star Mary Woronov previously, in my reviews for Seizure and Rock and Roll High School, so you'll excuse me if I keep things short in talking about her again. (Click on the respective links for more, including lots of pics.)
A former model-turned-actress, Woronov made her name as part of artist Andy Warhol's so-called "Factory," and starred in several of his films, notably Chelsea Girls. In the early 70's, she married filmmaker Theodore Gershuny. Though the marriage was short-lived, the two made several memorable movies together, including Sugar Cookies and the proto-slasher Silent Night, Bloody Night, which featured a lot of "Factory" alum in the cast.
However, her best-known cohort was undeniably writer/director/actor Paul Bartel, with whom she made any number of cult favorites, including Death Race 2000, Cannonball and Eating Raoul, the film she was coming off of making when she did Blood Theatre. She's also worked with everyone from Joe Dante (Hollywood Boulevard) to Cheech & Chong (Get Out of My Room) to Jim Wynorski (Chopping Mall) to Warren Beatty (Dick Tracy) to Gregg Araki (The Living End) and Rob Zombie (The Devil's Rejects).
One thing I've always loved about Woronov was the fact that she gives her all to whatever project she does, even those with the lowest of budgets- and even lower evidence of talent. Indeed, she even attended a screening of this film at the New Beverly (aka Quentin Tarantino's theatre) and participated in a Q&A afterwards, and this is hardly one of her best efforts.
You can see excerpts of said Q&A, which also features Sloane, along with a commentary track by Sloane on the recent Blu-Ray/DVD release from Vinegar Syndrome, which also features a new transfer of the film, and other goodies. I still can't believe we're living in a world in which a film like this gets the deluxe treatment on home video, but here we are. And it's kind of awesome, really.
The only other really notable cast member is David Millbern, who plays the younger version of the theatre owner. Your guess is as good as mine as to why he ages later on- maybe it's not actually a ghost and he survived the fire? Or more likely, the actor who played the younger version wasn't available for the rest of the shoot, lol. Either way, Millbern went on to bigger and better things, including being nominated for an Emmy for his work as a producer.
Horror, sci-fi and fantasy fans probably recognize him best from movies like Sorceress, Slumber Party Massacre, Midnight Confessions, Amanda & The Alien, Dead Weekend, Cyberella: Forbidden Passions, Menno's Mind (with Campbells Billy and Bruce), Doomsday Rock, Storm Chasers: Revenge of the Twister, Sweetheart Murders, Error in Judgment, Nostradamus, Red Team, Sanctimony, 2001: A Space Travesty, Deep Freeze, A Light in the Forest, Zolar, Chupacabra Terror, Fatal Reunion, Ice Spiders, Murder Dot Com, Something Evil Comes, The Nurse and Hush Up Sweet Charlotte.
Star Jenny Cunningham was in the pre-Empire Records comedy Record City and was the lead in a movie called Christiana, which featured a young Liam Neeson (the trailer's worth watching to see him dressed as a pilgrim!); Andrew Cofrin, who played Adrian, was in Monster in the Closet and Over Exposure; Cynthia Hartline, who played Jamie, was in Scalps and Biohazard; Joni Barnes, who played Dee Dee, was in Nights of Terror- after that, all of them were done.
The rest are strictly one-and-done, save Carl Bressler, who crops up as a pimp in one brief scene- he's been in quite a few flicks, including Avenging Angel, Arthur 2, Doppelganger, The Usual Suspects, The Californians and Frat Party. I don't think he even has a line here, though. Probably for the best, given his outfit, which features a feathered cap! (One of the prostitutes is Joanna Morales, BTW- she has her back to the camera, so as to hide her identity.)
Blood Theatre is absolutely ridiculous. The plot makes no sense- if the theatre was basically burnt down, why is it basically intact and looks like nothing happened years later, dave a few cobwebs? Why does the manager basically give Selena and Darcy a promotion when they are, like, the worst employees ever? Yes, Miss Blackwell does slap Selena at one point- well deserved, I might add- but, as she says, the fake makeup bruise Selena applies to make it look like she was abused on the job is on the wrong side of her face!
Obviously, Sloane didn't quite get the coverage he needed for certain scenes, but that doesn't explain all the inconsistencies in general, and like I said, that editing is hilariously inept, directly landing the film firmly in Ed Wood territory. And that score, also by Sloane, sounds like it was recorded on a Casio in demo mode, which doesn't help matters.
That said, Sloane fully owns up to the fact that it's a terrible movie, and regularly embraces it in its awful-ness in interviews and the video commentary, and such honestly is admittedly refreshing, especially in an era in which B-Movie filmmakers doing these sorts of things in retrospect tend to rewrite history and act as if they made the Citizen Kane of B-Movies- just have a listen to the hilarious commentary for the movie Jack-O, for a great example of such revisionist history.
Not so with Sloane. He's a filmmaker that knows he made a stinker, but is able to look back and laugh at it for what it was, and that's pretty cool. Ditto Woronov, for that matter. And if you like a good bad movie, then you, too, will be in for treat with this perfectly horrendous flick. Even at only 75 minutes, it drags a bit, but there's enough terrible stuff here to keep you entertained.
And the deaths, though often horribly executed, are often a lot of fun, notably the death by popcorn machine, the decapitation, and the amusing fire scene at the beginning, where the extras can't even run away right and keep bumping directly into each other!
It's thoroughly ridiculous throughout the entire film, and I just loved it. If you like bad movies, you probably will, too. By all means, check it out, but only if you like this sort of thing, because whoo boy, is it pretty terrible. In this case, that's a compliment, though. 😂
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